I came across this story this morning, Ten Things I Want To Tell Teenage Girls (Thanks @clearlyess!) by Kate Conner. She mentions things like:
Newsflash: the number of times you say “I hate drama”
Don’t play coy or stupid or helpless to get attention.
Stop saying things like, “I don’t care what anyone thinks about me.”
Reading it I was surprised at how many (If not all!) I agreed with!
I am older now and I like to think that all choices that I made in the past, both good and bad, have got me to where I am today.
The article did get me thinking about things I wish I could say to the ‘myself’ of ten years ago. Heres a few I came up with.
1. Find out more about your family
A big regret of mine is not learning more about my families past from grandparents. I have lost grandparents over the years as well as now supporting a grandparent suffering from Dementia. I would ask what their childhoods were like, things they did and people they know. I would ask them to tell me funny stories and about their parents and grandparents.
2. Dont follow the crowd
I would tell my self that its ok to want different things to other people and to be brave in making different choices! You don’t need to follow the same path as everyone else to be accepted.
3. Things happen and you can’t change them
We suffered a major loss in our family when I was younger. It came out of the blue and shattered so many people’s worlds the pieces have had a lot of trouble fitting back together again. I would like to go back and tell myself that bad things do happen, although we might not understand why, we can’t do anything to change them.
4. Stand up for yourself and speak your mind
I was such a push over! Especially with boys, they would say jump and it always felt as if I was saying ‘How high?’. I would go back and tell myself to stand up for yourself and not to be afraid to speak your mind.
5. Spend time with your parents.
As I’ve got older, the relationship I have with my mum and dad has got better and better. When I was younger I was always too busy to go away with them, or to go out with them or to watch a film with them. I would tell myself to get up off the sofa and spend time with them!
6. Spend more time with your friends
We lost touch a lot over the years and recently have all been reconnecting again. I wish I could tell myself to worry less about boys (See number 7!) and spend more time with your friends. I read a quote somewhere (I can’t think for the life of me where!) that said ‘University and afterwards is for finding a husband, highschool and all of the time before is for finding your bridesmaids’. I wish I had paid more attention to this, brushed of the silly arguments we used to have and just had a good time with my friends!
7. Stop chasing boys!
Pretty self-explanatory this one! I would tell myself to leave the boys alone, spend time with your friends, spend time with your family and that you are worth so much more than you think!
8. Read more books and pay attention in school
I wish I had got better grades than I did. I did work hard most of the time, although I didn’t revise nearly half as much as I could have! I would tell myself to pay attention and how lucky I am to be given a free education.
9. Learn more about the world around you
I would tell myself to watch the news! Although it’s not exactly what every teenager wants to know, I wish I had learnt more earlier (about politics, the world and general news) so as now I had a better understanding of why things happen or happened. Thanks to new things like magical twitter, I find things out daily about our world that continue to shock, amaze and educate me.
I would tell myself that waiting around for a boy to call or the guy that only wants to hang out with his friends is NOT the love of your life. You will meet someone, it might not be when you’re a hormonal teenager, but you will and you will fall in love!
Well those are a few of mine…I could probably think of a few more but ill save them for another time.
Is there anything you would say to your ‘past’ self if you could?